Friendships Part 1

Throughout my life I have had very few friends, there were many acquaintances but few true friends. There were the childhood friends - My best friend Michelle who lived next door, Harry across the street, I believe a girl named Debbie and one other whose name I can't recall. Michelle and I would play in the mud under the palm tree which ruled the yard where the house boundaries met the street. The tree provided shade in the summer and a place for us to sit on the curb in the middle of tree mess and open our crackerjack boxes to find the surprises inside. I have not seen this person in 30 years but we now share a sister I have never met from an affair my father had when I was young. The last I heard Michelle had AIDS. I don't know if she is even alive. But she was my first best friend.

Harry the boy across the street was my first love. During our early years this was he boy I played show me with and who gave me my first kiss when I was 5. I remember the show- me incident not by what I saw or happened but by the fact that my mother evil wench that she was made me take a nap instead of going swimming. Man was she cruel. My relationship with Harry was a soft sort of courtship who have with the boy next door - Completely innocent to the end there were hours of playing Risk and other board games on the ragged carpet of his bedroom floor. Of climbing orange trees and creating adventures in our minds. The others are only alive on the edges of my memories and I can not recall our times together. Except for the one time we all banded together and walked to the store to steal chocolate bars. For which we were of course caught and forced to return said chocolate with money and apology.

I remember a girl named Bobbie during my Barbie Years 2-3 grade we spent the night at eachothers houses admiring the collections of frilly doll accessories we had aquired.
And another girl named Tracy whose parents worked for the Airlines so she was always getting fancy gifts and lived in a plush looking apartment, but her parents were never there.

In Highschool there were various people I considered friend who I lost to time. I am positive my memories are happier than reality so I choose to live blind. Jr. High & High school friends always had motives. There were agendas and drama so little of it seems real.

there was Kris, and Kathy, and Libbey She was probably the closest friend I had in Jr.High.
I knew her for years before my parents let it slip that they thought her mother was a Lesbian and even at 12 I couldn't figure out what the big deal was. I had spent numerous night there and other than her mothers friend being a rather strict type of person it never once crossed my mind that they were sleeping together even though I knew they slept in the same bed. I don't think I was really a stupid child but it mattered so little in my life I never questioned it.

Kathy was the first woman I ever had a sexual experience with, it was peaceful and exciting all at the same time. Kris was a member of our church she shared my first concert with me. We went with a boy named Scott who was the dreamboat in my eyes. I was a lowly 12 and he was 15, the older man who I thought I could capture. I am sure he only went because my mother bought him a free ticket to the Eagles Concert. But I knew it was love.

I have had trouble with Crystals in my life- not sure why but had ended up on the wrong side of a few who at least said they were friend yet turned out to be one of those dramatic stab in the back sort of friends. I generally get rid of those when they show their true colors but sometimes they lie very well.