The Continuing Adventures Of Super Customer Service Lady Lydia!

The continuing sit-com starring our own Miss Lydia!

We pick up where we left off, with a reply from our beloved but befuddled disgruntled customer, who appears to have no sense of humor at all. (For refresher of previous episode, refer to earlier blog post.)

Buyer Who Never Laughs: I hope you think you're funny. It is you who owes me an apology for posting negative feedback. I have done nothing wrong or untrue. I posted positive feedback, unless your "personalities" are all color blind. I posted true information; you did not. Also, I did go to the post office and was informed that third class mail in UNINSURABLE. The package was very clearly stamped third class, and the post office refused to allow me to file a claim. You may very well have given the $1.30 to the post office in Waldron, but they didn't insure the package. I figured mutual
withdrawal was an easy compromise with which we could both be happy and simply walk away and not deal with each other ever again.

Nonetheless, if you are unwilling to withdraw the feedback, I hope you are willing to start shopping for plane tickets to come to Texas, because I am fully prepared to file a lawsuit against you for breach of contract for failing to insure the package (or at least use a shipping rate that is insurable), seeking damages, legal expenses and a judicial injuction ordering the removal of the negative feedback. It will be filed in the District Court of Harris County, Texas, which has jurisdiction because it was an internet sale (if you want, I can file it in federal court). You will be required to appear, and if you do not, a judgment by default will be issued. At that
point, if you fail to pay damages for breach of contract and legal fees, the State of Kansas and Harper County allow me to file a lien against your property.

So, you can either agree to withdraw the feedback, or you can get ready to spend a lot of money fighting this in court. It's up to you.

And by the way, I'm not a madame.


Happy Customer Service Reply:
Dear Sweetcheeks, (um I mean Mr. Freeman)
I hope that you are having a fantabulous day! My apologies for mistaking you for a Madame. I thought that surely only a women could be so bitchy. I am so tickled to hear that you enjoyed reading my email as much as I enjoyed writing it. Sadly, you will no longer be dealing with my client, Faeriequeene. She has simply washed her hands of this matter and I have been employed to act in her stead. I have all the time in the world to answer your questions and emails and will be delighted to do so!
Please mail me any correspondence or legal documents that you find necessary. Please be aware that any attempts that you make to communicate with Faeriequeene will only be forwarded to, and answered by, me. I am delighted to inform you that Faeriequeene will not be withdrawing her feedback under any circumstances. There was nothing untrue about thefeedback left for you Mr. Freeman. While you did leave feedback with the little plus sign and green color, most ebayers, whether they choose to or not, can read.Positive feedback rating - "Not pkd very well; cplofbrkn pcs; did refund some money; prbly wldnt buyagn" Buyer:usafbugleboy Just in case you're not getting it yet, "prbly wldnt buy agn" equals bad feedback bugleboy! My client refunded you for the two plates broken in transit, even though those items that were damaged by the post office were covered by postal insurance and she was not required to do so.
She also gave you a partial refund on your shipping cost. Personally, I think that you are being a whiney candy ass baby and I would not have given you anything. Her feedback was 100% honest and warranted. I have attached a scanned photo of the original post office insurance receipt for your purchase. Again,please feel
free to contact me at any time if there is anything further that you require. Good luck in your future endeavors!
Hugs!, Marilyn
Happy Customer Service

"Help with those customers that evolution has left behind"

Freakazoid Ebay Buyer:I guess you missed the part where I mentioned I was willing to withdraw my feedback as well. I will draw
up the legal pleadings this next week. When considering $300 or so for airfare, $100 for a hotel,food expenses and, of course, legal expenses, $400+ seems like a heavy price to pay just to keep some negative feedback. This is on top of the fact that
you will lose the suit and be ordered to pay my court costs as well. So tell me, is it worth it to you lose that much money over some Ebay feedback for a $5.00 item?

Before replying to the above email, Lydia and I had an unrelated conversation concerning my inability to make decisions anymore, including the ongoing internal debate I had been having for 2 hours over whether to have waffles or pancakes for breakfast. This apparently inspired the following reply that Lydia wrote. (Okay, I can't speak to what insires Lydia - you'll have to talk to her about that.)

Happy Customer Service Reply:
My Dearest Noel,

Pancakes sound great! I know they have a lot of carbohydrates but it's really worth it. You just need to remember to use real butter, margarine is just not the same. Lawsuit smawsuit, I'm a lover not a fighter, but if you persist.... I'll be forced to mention your name in my womens's prayer circle. You know those old gal's - they love to talk and before too long all the guys in the men's fellowship will have Noel Freeman on their list too and you really don't want to be on too many lists at one time because then you will have to be prepared for all the positive changes that will
occur in your life. Thanks be to God. Remember, if you are in AA, don't drink the red stuff it's Morgan David, the yellow stuff is safe because it's just white grape
juice. The important thing to remember is that all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God and everyone is not out to get you Noel. We all must live with the consequences of our actions. But really, frozen waffles would be okay too. I know they are not as good as homemade, but I like them. They are pretty good, people really shouldn't discriminate against them because they are a convenience food. Not that waffles really take a long time to cook. It's just that there is the whole having to clean the mixing bowl and waffle iron. I like to put vanilla in my batter, you should try it some time. If you need some tin foil to line your hat I'll be glad to send you some free of charge. Please contact me if you are in need of anything what so ever, I live to serve.

Peace out brother,
Marilyn
Happy Customer Service
"Longhorns rule Aggies drool"