Tuesday, February 10, 2004

The Smoking Police (Rated Adult)

Somewhere in New York there is a new breed of cop attempting to enforce the new anti smoking laws. No matter where you are or what youre doing they will catch you.

" Hurry Seargent Ammo" Screamed the street policeman in a much higher and squeakier voice that normal.
"We need back up, you can't understand the horror. If you don't get here soon there won't be anyone left."


"Okay men you have heard the tape, now were going in and were going to catch this roque smoker if we have to take out the city to do it. Do you understand me gentlemen?!!!"

"Yes Sir," They all yelled into the dark and rainy night. Turning to face the luxury Plaza hotel and armed to the teeth with automatic weapons and the latest in cigarette smoke detecting equipment. The Forty Men marched as one being into the hotel.

The News crews were already inside the building having intercepted the call from the lost policeman. They were interviewing the distraught guest about reaction to being exposed to the second hand smoke now inside the Plaza's sealed
ventalation system.

The City's top public victum counselors were trying to help the most damaged recover from their trauma explaining to them that they would only need a few years of counseling to get past this horrific event. The smoke alarms and flashers going off in the lobby gave a loud eerie blue cast to the lobby.

The Smoke police did not stop for these poor people caught in the crossfire, they continued their march to the elevators and then entered them in an orderly fashion.

Sgt Ammo was at the forefront, mad as hell that his other team had already been lost to this miscreant smoker, The elite team finally arrived at the 13th floor and headed towards door number 137, They stopped right out side the door. Loud moaning noises and the slurpy sound of spilled blood was echoing through the door.

Sgt Ammo was ready and with a fell swoop of his battering ram he knocked down the door. A wave of blue smoke poured out of the room, Luckily his men all had their googgles on so that the smoke would not bother their eyes. Unfortunately they had not brought the gas masks and the smoke sent them all into coughing fits.

Sgt Ammo was not to be deterred and he ordered the charge in between fits of coughing. Slowly the room cleared and he saw the men from the first team strewn about the floor. He could not believe his eyes, All of them were naked and rolling around on the floor with small blue creatures attached to their uh.... privates, smoking cigarettes. It was hideous.

Oh the shame how could they have ever put one of those illegal and forbidden nasty things in thier mouths.
Not to mention what ever those blue things were on their uh....middles.

He ordered the strike team to begin gathering up the men and trying to get the blue creatures off of them to they could be medivaced to hospital for the smoking insane.

Link the newest member of the team was the first to go down. He had been trying to peel the blue creature off one of the cops, uh....um... dick, ok I said they were sucking their dicks in a hideously wanton fashion, Anyways Link had just wrapped his fingers around the middle of the blue thing when this feeling of uncontrolable lust came over him and he ripped the creature off the other cop and quickly removed his pants so it could suck on him.

Soon Sgt Ammo's entire second squad was down with the first, Only Ammo himself didn't succumb to the evil. Perhaps because he was a stronger man, a moral man, or perhaps just because he left all the work to the other guys and never actually touched one of those blue things.

Ammo was looking around the room trying to think of something to do next as there were no more smoking police to call for back up and he didn't want to look like a complete idiot call in the swat team for a recalcitrant smoker, when he noticed the grill over the air duct was the major source of smoke that was pouring into the room. As the men on the floor had finished most of theirs by now and were passed out whimpering in pleasure as the creatures went right on sucking.
Active little suckers whatever they are thought sarge

Walking over the bodies and stepping on quite a few, Ammo reached the air duct and ripped the grill from the vent. Sitting just inside was a tiny old blue man about the size of a toy poodle.

"What you want man," the small blue smoking perp asked, Can't you see I am trying to have a smoke in peace." First you invade my room then you steal my pixies, Can't you just let me one cigarette in peace.

Sgt Ammo being a man who lived by the book started immediately reading the blue man his rights, Such as the right to put out his cigarette immediately or be shot.

"Ya right man" the blue guy said and proceeded to get up and walk around the curve deeper into the vent system.

"Stop or I'll shoot" yelled Ammo knowing it was useless but pro forma anyway. Signing with regret Ammo realized he wa going to have to go after the little man.

Hiking up his pants and stretching his shoulders Ammo put a dresser in front of the wall an climbed head first into the vent after the blue man. First the head, then the shoulders, then the beer gut and that was his undoing.

When Ammo was well wedged and cussing up a blue streak the little blue man came back around the corner and stared at him, shaking his head and tsk tsking you really shouldn't have done that man. With a shrill whistle, he called to his minions,

Ammo felt the zipper on his service pants roll down one tooth at a time, then he felt something warm and slimy remove his cock from his pants. Then there were tongues all he could feel were tongues, covering his entire body or at least the parts not in the vent. Seeing as how he had not had sex for more than ten years with anyone but himself it took mere moments for him to come, but the blue creatures did not stop and as they kept going it became painful.


Suddenly life seemed different to Ammo everthing was better, happier, stronger and brighter than before.
"Hey man" he asked the blue man, Can I bum one of those?

All of new York cities finest smoking police were lost that night, disappeared without a trace.

1 Comments:

Blogger mespeedracer said...

This story kinda makes me want to have a smoke LOL

7:55 PM  

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