Motherhood Part I

 I have about 15 minutes before Ranger's bus gets here, if I wasn't waiting for him I would be hightailing it to L's school. There waits my crying daughter. Just a few minutes before she called I was feeling so accomplished for getting the taxes lowered on three more properties. This is probably the first time in recent history that she has real and not imagined concerns that I could actually help her with, but over the phone I could do nothing. We are connected to our children, spiritually. I believe this, it's not just sentiment or affection. It's a real physical emotional link. Maybe I am not as empathetic as I should be always. I'll have to be honest as connected as I feel to my children I don't share that connection with my parents. They didn't nurture the natural bond so it is really just not there. So here I am just waiting, trying to decide if I should drop little brother with the sitter before I collect her. I cannot always fly in and save the day. I have to keep telling myself this. We have to let them fall. I can be the big squishy soft thing that they can fall on so it won't hurt as much. This is what you have to look forward to young mothers. So relish the moment because it gets complicated at times.