A new blogger! Welcome Lydia, loved reading about your family...I can certainly relate to the four unruly kids and the 'slightly' controlling husband (or so I used to think mine was, thinking VERY controlling...these days...as I slowly become more aware of how MUCH it affected me)... wow... and, in our separation, I see more clearly the effects, on our incredible kids...and some of them sadden me, because I think he passes some of his weakness on to them by virtue of that controlling nature. Fears..are so prominent in his life, they take over and rule. I try to be understanding, but I am still so very angry at his actions and cruelty that it is still hard for me. Detachment is a'happenin' though...at least it sure feels less like a bunji cord, pulling me back to him....