!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Last night was very bad. I haven't seen much of Kelly in days he is doing everything he can to stay away from the house. Well last night I sat in his office, which is pretty much a typical Ying thing to do. This is my trying to interract with him and he just rambles on about whatever the new thing he has to be pissed off about is and I sit there as long as I can or until he gets tired of hearing himself and kicks me out of his office. This has passed for a relationship for at least the last 6 years. I notice there is a bill for around 400 on his desk from the city and I pick it up and explain to him it is because one year they accidentally homesteaded two properties. He insisted that this was not a bill but rather a reduction in our taxes. It took me a few minutes to convince him otherwise. He was then pretty pissed and said he wouldn't pay it. I said okay but then they will just put a lien on that property. He was pissed as hell and I told him that even though the city was at fault that it is our responsibility to read what the tax assessor sends us each year. He was yelling and acting like a God damn baby. So I told him that he might want to talk to his sponsor about this or better yet get a sponsor. Then he announces that he has been sober for more than 25 years. I don't know what possessed me but I informed him that he was not SOBER just a dry drunk and that he was the most angry miserable person that I know.

He then pointed out that I had no right to say anything in light of my recent actions and current situation. He did not put it so eloquently and he does have a point. The conversation digressed to he may never forgive me, but he's not leaving and if I would have talked to him about this before I would have been right(I pointed out that I have and he just yelled at me for it and shifted the blame to me) but now I am just a cheating bitch bla bla bla. Well he didn't say cheating bitch but that is what he meant. He says that he is not leaving, and that I could leave but I have NOTHING so I might as well stay and get an education and a good job before I leave. He also says he has no plans on changing anything. In fact he plans on spending even less time with me than before.

So I guess I'm leaving, I don't know exactly how I'll do it but an exit is certain. I guess if I fully accept the fact that it's over I may be able to hang out and do what I need to do. I should have left a long time ago. I guess the best thing to do would be to act like nothing is wrong and try to win his trust back, convince him to sell a house and then take half the money and run. I am so fucking tired of being in this non relationship. The funniest part of all this is that Kelly believes that all assets belong to him. Won't he be in for a shock, I at least need a very good lawyer.
Kelly doesn't give a damn about me, he just wanted me so he could have the kids and a so called "FAMILY".